Posted in taking action, the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, Dr. Paul, fitness, law of attraction, losing weight, moving, moving in the right direction, perspective, success, weight loss, weight loss help on December 6, 2008| 2 Comments »
A one-minute message from my friend, Dr. Paul. We can practice having days consistent with becoming fit. If we consistently practice having “fit” days, we’ll find ourselves… moving in the right direction.
Dr. Paul uses driving as a metaphor for life. Notice the car he’s driving. He’s moving forward, and in the driver’s seat. He’s had a lot of practice.
Posted in the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, fitness, law of attraction, losing weight, perspective, success, weight loss, weight loss help on October 12, 2008| 3 Comments »
Use this audio player to hear the audio companion, or download it. (Duration 4’58”)
We humans have a tendency to run around slapping labels on things without thinking about whether that’s a beneficial activity. Don’t get me wrong, now. Labels can be useful. For example, slapping the label “dangerous” on the idea “jump off cliff” contributes towards a longer life.
Les McGuire and Dr. Paul have both talked about the dubious nature of the terms “good” and “bad”. Our society uses these terms loosely. When something pleasant happens, we whip out the “good” label. When faced with unpleasant conditions out comes the “bad” label. Unfortunately, hasty use of “good” and “bad” can lead us to jumping to the wrong conclusions. An old story illustrates this.
There once was an old farmer who had a son and a horse. They were very poor and worked from dawn to dusk to provide a meager subsistence for themselves.
One night a fierce storm knocked down a tree, and broke a fence. The horse escaped in the night. The next day a neighbour came by to see how the old farmer fared. When he saw that the farmer’s horse had escaped, he cried, “Oh, how terrible! How will you tend your field? It’s truly a rotten day!”
The old farmer shrugged his shoulders and said, “How do you know that’s bad?”
Some time later the horse found its way home, accompanied by some wild horses. When the neighbour came by he exclaimed, “What luck! It’s a good day for you!”
The old farmer shrugged his shoulders and said, “How do you know that’s good?”
Not two weeks later, the son was taming one of the horses. The horse threw the young man. In the fall he broke an arm and a leg. The neighbour, upon hearing the news, exclaimed, “Harvest is starting. What horrible luck! I thought my day was bad, but this!”
The old farmer shrugged his shoulders and said, “How do you know that’s bad?”
Three days later the king’s men came to town, conscripting all able-bodied young men to serve in a war. They passed over the old farmer’s son because of his injuries. The neighbour was dejected because his two oldest sons were taken by the king’s soldiers. “How lucky you are! My sons are gone, but you still have your boy. Be glad for this day, my friend!”
The old farmer shrugged his shoulders and said, “How do you know that’s good?”
The old farmer knew that “good” and “bad” events are matters of perspective. Just because an event or condition is pleasing does not mean that it’s “good”. Neither does an unpleasant event or condition automatically become “bad”.
None of those circumstances were inherently “good” or “bad”. They simply were. Life happened. A horse was lost. A son was spared. Was the loss of a horse really “bad” given that hindsight?
My wife has been following a Japanese TV program which triggered all this reflection. One unflappable character made a statement along the lines of, “Deep regret is my friend. It helps me not repeat the same mistakes again.”
The rain falls on the just and the unjust. We don’t need to seek out deep regret in order to improve our lives. We can, however, take it easier on ourselves when confronted with those “bad” days, and not get careless on those “good” days. Gratitude and patience can keep us rooted.
Status: Successfully holding steady. 75 pounds (34 kg) lighter since March, over 105 pounds (48 kg) since last year.
Posted in taking action, the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, fitness, law of attraction, losing weight, perspective, success, weight loss, weight loss help on October 3, 2008| 3 Comments »
Getting fit is sometimes boring… mind numbing, check yourself into the funny farm monotony. Other parts of regular life are like that at times, too. In the last three weeks I shut myself in a closet, grit my teeth and ground away at a project. In successful investing, the same process will be encountered. Huh?
As I was plowing through this project to complete it, I hit a day where I turned my chair away from the computer because I was utterly demoralized. This project had dragged on for over a year, and I had committed to seeing my portion done regardless of the others on the project. The software was in shreds, and I could see no end in sight. In my frustration I shut out many extra activities (including regular blogging) and chained my body to the table in front of the computer. (Figuratively, folks!) But that day… I had nothing more to give. I was spent.
Having swiveled the chair around, I stared blankly at the wall of shelves, jammed full of books. I certainly didn’t want to look just above or below my line of sight. Tomes on the deep magic of computer science waited to assault my vision… the last thing I wanted to see. If I looked to the right, philosophy, law, languages, reference volumes would disappear from sight. My eyes would be looking at them, but nothing registered on the brain. The only other direction had books on personal growth. Ugh. That last thing I wanted was to be uplifted! How can I wallow if I let good ideas into my head?
I closed my eyes, and must have dozed for a short while for I came to my senses with a start. My black cat had heaved her fat carcass onto my lap and was purring madly as she eased her mass into a comfortable position. The sharp edge to my mood had dulled somewhat, and I chose to let her sit there for a while.
After some time I picked up a book that lay dormant, unfinished, for years. I wasn’t ready for the message back then and set it aside. I scanned the fading marks of highlighted phrases, when a short dialog caught my eye. I’ll substitute words to change the topic from investing to weight loss and fitness.
“I now realize why it is so hard for most people to follow a simple plan.”
“And why is that?” I asked.
“Because following a simple plan to become [fit] is boring,” said [fit] dad. “Human beings are quickly bored and want to find something more exciting and amusing. That is why only three out of a hundred people become [fit]. They start following a plan, and soon they are bored. So they stop following the plan and then they look for a magic way to get [fit] quick. They repeat the process of boredom, amusement, and boredom again for the rest of their lives. That is why they do not get [fit]. They cannot stand the boredom of following a simple, uncomplicated plan to get [fit]. Most people think there is some magic to getting [fit] through [dieting]. Or they think that if it is not complicated, it cannot be a good plan. Trust me; when it comes to [health], simple is better than complex.”Kiyosaki, Robert, Rich Dad’s Guide to Investing, Chapter 8, editing mine.
The message that I got from this was not that one has to live a boring life doing things that one hates. What sunk into me was an old quote that I heard when I was younger. “Integrity is the ability to follow through on a decision long after the emotional peak is gone.” Something like that.
That brief message did help me to re-center my mind. I did take up my project again; not with burning enthusiasm but with the knowledge that despite all appearances, I was almost done. (And as of now, I am done.)
My progress on my weight loss had slowed to a crawl, but I still retained the determination to remain on the path. The path I was following was simple, but I had allowed skewed thinking in one part of my life to affect the other areas. I got “bored”, or rather, frustrated with the steady progress I was making on that project and decided to try a “get done quick” plan. I didn’t get done quick, but I certainly got grumpy in a hurry! 🙂
Why this long, rambling post? I’ve had a human experience. As a human experience, I’m certain that while the details may be particular to me, that others have had similar experiences. We get through them eventually… as we re-awaken from our stupor.
We can do things to mix up the routine, and those are so important to help mitigate the fact that the raw fundamentals need to be in place. There remains that gap between changing our course of action and that new path becoming a habit. Once it’s habit, we expend little to no energy thinking about it. It’s just a natural part of our life.
For the good news, I believe I’m somewhere in the range of where I should be, weight-wise. I’ll be getting some expert opinion… but I wanted to express that I’m grateful for everybody’s encouragement and support.
Status: 75 pounds (34 kg) lighter since March, over 105 pounds (48 kg) since last year.
Posted in fitness, the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, fitness, law of attraction, losing weight, perspective, success, weight loss, weight loss help on September 14, 2008| 3 Comments »
“It’s always darkest just before dawn.” That’s the best time to bust into the cookie jar — nobody can see you. 🙂
I thought this worth sharing, for all of us who are in our own “middle parts”, seeking better fitness.
Often when we are right in the middle of a difficult situation, it is tempting to look at our results as a disaster. “I’ve failed!” we might lament, feeling completely certain that life’s test has defeated us. A few days ago I was meeting with a client who expressed something like this and his embarrassment at being in the kind of situation that he was. I responded to him that from my perspective he was describing not a failure, but the middle part of a very inspiring story. Think about how some of the stories that inspire you the most have some very difficult stuff in the middle. Everything is OK in the end – if it is not OK, it is not the end! Keep working on your story — you’re not done yet.
— Dr. Paul, 3 September 2008 “M-Power” weekly e-mail, The Middle Part (emphasis mine)
I’ve enjoyed reading your blogs, and look forward to reading your great endings!
Posted in fitness, taking action, the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, fitness, law of attraction, losing weight, perspective, success, weight loss, weight loss help on August 20, 2008| 8 Comments »
Signs sometimes give me whiplash… well, mental whiplash.
“Get a new body. Get a new life.”
That’s what I saw in the window of a niche gym next to a grocery store that I frequent. There’s usually a parking spot open in front of it, so I see their advertising. “That’s backwards,” I thought to myself. As I was running the outskirts of the grocery store my brain was churning, re-examining the statement from different angles.
Human experience shows that that people tend to think that success comes from the following sequence:
In other words, you must first have something, which allows you to do an action which will allow you to be something pleasant. A template that we’ve all seen comes from the weight loss industry (over $45 billion in the U.S. alone). It tells us that if we have product Z, we’d do weight loss (often without fuss or effort), and thus be happy, successful, popular, etc.
Falling into this thinking is a common human behaviour. It’s comforting and looks like the easier road since it allows us to push responsibility for a segment of our lives onto somebody else or their thing. Unfortunately, it perpetuates a cycle of frustration and dissatisfaction. We become frustrated because having product Z didn’t produce the desired results (usually a sense of happiness or satisfaction)…. though when product Z came along we conveniently forgot that neither did products A through Y.
My journey has followed the opposite path. The things that we have in the physical world, most especially the things most personal to us — such as (un)fitness — are ultimately outcomes of what happens in our heads. Our thoughts control our actions. Our actions impact our results. Our results… we see as our lives.
Lasting change comes from the opposite order:
If we change our state of “being”, i.e. how we look and think about our lives on a consistent basis, our habits will follow. In other words, we start to “do” the things we think about. As our habitual actions become aligned with those that produce desired results, “having” fitness is inevitable. Be. Do. Have.
Do not confuse this with the “think happy thoughts” or “Law of Attraction” crowd that believe that intense visualization and belief alone will cause change. Beliefs that don’t effect useful action will alter nothing in the physical world.
This is along the lines of how I understand what Ghandi meant when he said, “We need to be the change we wish to see in the world.” It’s not esoteric existentialism, but practical advice.
Posted in taking action, the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, fitness, health, law of attraction, losing weight, nutrition, perspective, success, weight loss on July 28, 2008| 10 Comments »
As I read an article about choosing happiness, the last paragraph brought back memories of events that deeply impressed me. I had a number of times the great privilege of sitting in a few public and private meetings with Les McGuire before his death. On his radio program, he would introduce himself saying, “I am the man who loves his life.”
Many have talked about “creating the life you love”, but that’s not the same as loving one’s life. One can certainly find enjoyment in a charmed life filled with ease, riches, or glamor— creating “a life you love” — but still not love one’s life. When I say, “I love my life”, I mean that I place great value on my existence and wish to make the most of it, as opposed to frittering it away with needless pain, hollowness, or vain pursuits. Don’t get me wrong — one can have both, but “creating a life that you love” is an external pursuit. Loving one’s life springs from a human’s inner core, and through action manifests itself in the world.
If one loves one’s live, a series of actions naturally extend from that motive power. In other words, one follows that declaration with the word “therefore”. For example, in context of this blog, I can say, “I love my life, therefore I act as a good steward over my physical body so that I have the physical capacity to act fully, without physical hinderance.”
Note that this is different from saying, “If I love my life then I will _____.” That’s a common manipulation tactic. How often have we heard, in performances if not real life, something akin to “You’d do X if you truly loved me”? By this the manipulator seeks “X” as evidence of the love, and insinuates (or states explicitly) that not doing “X” is evidence of lack of love. This poor line of reasoning appears to be engrained into human relations, evidenced by the fact that it can be found in ancient literature and religious writings (e.g. Paris in the old Greek myths, or Matthew 4).
When I say, “I love my life, therefore I do X”, the action stems naturally from the love of my life. Why do I rewire my brain? Why do I exercise? Why have I reformed what I eat? It’s not because I have set a goal ahead of me, that I’m working towards. It’s because those are natural extensions of my inner desire. I enjoy my existence, therefore I breathe air and avoid sticking solid objects through my brain. Ceasing to breathe, or putting bullet through my brain would be counterproductive.
Before I commenced my fitness journey I had deceived myself into believing that I was in pretty good shape, and that my condition didn’t really hinder me. Since my collision with reality last March, I wiped that deception from my eyes. I replaced that harmful belief with a new belief: I exercise good stewardship over my body. As with any endeavor in life, it’s been a bumpy ride, but I’ve been steadily progressing.
As I get into shape, I’m discovering new meaning in that phrase, “I am the man who loves his life”. My beliefs drive my actions. My actions produce results. I enjoy the results. The desirable results reinforce my beliefs. This cycle, repeated, helps to create new neural pathways in my mind… a fancy way of saying that new habits are born, and a new life comes into being.
Everyone has their reason for getting in shape, discontent being common. Discontent can carry a person for quite some time, but can it carry a person all the way to the goal? Perhaps. It carried me through the first month or two, but could not carry me over the finish line. I’ve become fit enough that I could call my current condition “pretty darned good”, and hold my position. When I look in the mirror, it’s quite tempting. I am looking really good compared to my prior state, and at times the routine grates.
Here in the Western states there is a phrase, “Cowboy up”. Its essence means to rise to the challenge at hand. I have had to find something deeper along the way to drive me back into the saddle of the bucking horse called “life”. I love my life, and therefore once again I place my left foot in the stirrup, throw my right leg up and over, planting myself squarely in the saddle — ready to risk being thrown to the ground again. I know with a certainty that I’ll reach my objective. I won’t be thrown forever because I’m learning to ride this wild horse called “life”. Eventually I will prevail because my actions are consistent with success. Success is available to every person willing to follow the same cycle. Believe. Act. Evaluate Results. If an “average Joe” can do this, anybody can.
Status: 62 pounds (28 kg) lighter.
Posted in fitness, the body, the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, fitness, health, law of attraction, losing weight, nutrition, perspective, success, weight loss on July 21, 2008| 6 Comments »
Two weekends ago, an unexpected revelation struck me. I’ll be participating in a large cycling event next month, and decided to focus that Saturday on distance riding. I thought that perhaps if I pushed myself I might be able to ride 30 miles (48 km). I prepped and started pedaling. I enjoyed the morning, and the miles peeled by. After twenty-something miles, I found that I really felt good still. It seemed odd, as I should have been ready to call it quits. (Or so the little voice in my head was saying.)
I was at the bottom of the valley, but I noticed that I was within riding distance of a favorite canyon, and struck out for it. I rode up the canyon and zoomed back down to meet family for lunch at the bottom of the canyon. I put the trike on the car rack and we went home. In all, I cycled 40 miles (64 km). I was tired, of course, but far from being “wiped out”.
Compare that to last year, which I mention on the About Page. Last October I rode 50 miles (80 km) in a cycling event. This was a big accomplishment for me, considering I was obese. The ride and some extenuating circumstances really hit me hard physically and psychologically. I was physically spent around 42 miles (68 km), and the last miles were a grinding crawl in low gear, my mind not really caring about anything but getting back to the motel so I could get off the stupid machine. If my hotel wasn’t also the finish line, I would not have cared about the finish line; not one bit. Afterwards, I recovered physically quick enough, but I hung my trike on its place in the garage and didn’t touch it again. Mentally I was beaten. There the trike hung until after I decided to re-engineer my body, mind, and soul… setting myself on a new path.
That was last year. The startling revelation that happened two weeks ago, at that twenty-something mile point, was the following. I was still cycling according to last year’s thinking. I had assumed that if I pushed myself, stretched myself to the limit I might be able to ride 30 miles. I didn’t understand that my improved overall fitness would so dramatically increase my abilities. Where I expected to turn around and commence a slow grind home was in fact a place where I said, “Hey, let’s ride up a mountain!”… and did so.
Yesterday I put this to the test. Until now I envisioned 50 miles to be a barrier. I was determined to discover whether I could best that personal record. In the end I did just fine. I ran out of water at about 46 miles (74 km), but was determined to grind those last four miles out. In the end, I rode 51.55 miles (82.96 km) in 3h50’47”. Not a world record, but something that I would not have believed until I experienced it. I showered, slept for three hours, and have bounced back just fine.
As we deliberately re-engineer our lives, we’ll not know our expanded capabilities until we push our boundaries. At times we’ll be astonished to see how far our limits have ballooned. These unexpected bonus events will come along only if you’re willing to seize the opportunities to test your reach. I enjoyed this moment of personal triumph, and moved onto the next phase.
I hope you all will relish your moments of breakthrough, both big and small, and keep moving. Best wishes!
Status: 60 pounds (27 kg) lighter.
Posted in fitness, the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, fitness, forgiveness, health, inner peace, law of attraction, losing weight, nutrition, peace, perspective, success, weight loss on July 10, 2008| 9 Comments »
I read people’s fitness and weight loss blogs, looking for people’s successes. I find those personal stories energizing. However, the most common theme that I run across on weight loss blogs is self-criticism and negativity. When I see this, I often think of some principles that I learned from Dr. Fred Luskin’s book Forgive for Good: A PROVEN Pescription for Health and Happiness. I read this before my own fitness journey. A friend, Dr. Paul Jenkins mentioned it.
Dr. Luskin is director and cofounder of the Stanford University Forgiveness Project. The book summarizes scientific research he conducted, including work with some of the toughest cases, such as Irish who lost loved ones in Northern Ireland’s civil war.
In his book, Dr. Luskin talks about some of the myths that surround forgiveness. Let’s get those out of the way. Forgiveness does not mean:
Forgiveness consists of releasing grievance stories and/or unreasonable expectations in our lives. This means that we stop directing attention on them in our mind. We stop bringing them into our mental home and giving them the seat of honor at our table.
Forgiveness is:
He summed it up best for me with the single sentence, “Forgiveness is the practice of extending your moments of peacefulness.”
So how does this relate to fitness? When I look at the atmosphere surrounding weight loss specifically and fitness generally, it’s easy to find people publicly whipping themselves. This contributes to my general aversion of anything with the word “diet” in it. The word “diet” tends to carry with it promises of sunshine quickly followed by roiling dark clouds of frustration and disappointment.
The Western concept of forgiveness overlaps heavily with the Zen notion of unattachment. Events happen. Choices are made. Unexpected curve balls hit us in the head. Forgiveness is about acknowledging these things but not allowing ourselves to get caught up in them.
For example, say I choose to binge on jumbo-sized jalapeño “Bahama mama” hot dogs, juice, and chips. I could choose to get out the cat-o’-nine-tails and flog myself (mentally) into an unrecognizable bleeding pulp. In the past that would have been normal behavior. I would choose poorly, and build my own personal hell.
After a while I realized that Hell’s not the best place to camp out in. The company sucks.
I had decisions to make, such as:
I’m completely average here. I sometimes get caught up in those moments of anger. Last week was tough for me and I slid sideways almost the whole week. I’ve never seen my weight spike up and down so sharply. I have to admit that there were a handful of days in the row that dredged up similar “up and down” emotions.
I would like to suggest that if I can, we all can learn to have more moments of compassionate forgiveness for ourselves and increase our moments of peace. When our hearts and mind are in this state of peace, we can think clearly and use our reason more effectively. From a sanctuary of peace we can also rewire our subconscious mind with greater ease. This allows us to replace our old habits with new, making the process of becoming fit more automatic; becoming a joy rather than a war.
I’m past last week’s roller coaster, and quite frankly forgot about until I started writing this section. Lessons learned, for which I can express gratitude.
I hope this post isn’t too heavy. I’ve been somewhat pensive since last night. I considered writing about something else but it’s a part of the human experience and I have hopes that somebody else might benefit.
Status: 59 pounds (27 kg) lighter
A wise man will make haste to forgive, because he knows the true value of time, and will not suffer it to pass away in unnecessary pain.
– Samuel Johnson
Posted in fitness, the body, the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, fitness, health, law of attraction, losing weight, nutrition, perspective, success, weight loss on June 8, 2008| 14 Comments »
I had an interesting experience. It brought to mind a 19th century poem that has the words, “Do what is right, let the consequence follow.”
After I wrote Pick Nits Only When Useful, Then Stop, I realized that while I had been monitoring my change in weight, I wasn’t really tracking. In other words, other than progress reported in this blog, I wasn’t really recording and reviewing my progress. It’s funny how even when we know something, that we humans try to cut corners.
Now, I don’t like tracking things closely unless it’s useful. It’s a bother. I don’t like doing it. I assumed that I could get away with simply monitoring my progress without actually putting date and weight into a spreadsheet because I had hard evidence that I was succeeding.
When decided to move up my accountability a notch and actually record and review, I plugged the numbers into the spreadsheet and graphed the result, I was completely caught off guard. Put these two things side by side.
| My Actions | My Beliefs |
|---|---|
| I have been diligent in sticking to my new eating habits and doing more butt-moving. | In my mind I was “stuck” for the last week or two in May. My mind told me that I wasn’t progressing. |
So, given what I was doing, and what I thought was happening, which carried the day? Take a look for yourself. Here is a graph from the spreadsheet, showing weight over time. (Forgive the Japanese labels.)
Notice how there is no plateau through May. Mother Nature carried the day. Because I remained quite consistent in my daily disciplines, I reaped the natural consequence of my actions.
I don’t know where the phrase “You can’t fool Mother Nature” came from, but for me it represents a vital bit of real life. Actions have consequences independent of our intentions, beliefs, hopes, wishes, etc. Jump off a cliff naked and you’ll make a mark on the floor of the canyon, every time, despite any beliefs to the contrary.
Now, I know this. I’ve experienced this. I have the victories and scars to show for it. But as I heard in a writer’s conference today, emotion exaggerates [distorts] reality. What I was perceiving and what was happening in the real world were two separate thing.
So I had reinforced a fundamental lesson: have faith in the process.
Joe Average needs reminding.
Status: 46 pounds (21 kg) lighter.
Posted in the body, the mind, tagged cholesterol, diet, dieting, fitness, health, law of attraction, losing weight, nutrition, perspective, success, weight loss on June 3, 2008| 2 Comments »
I’ve read literally hundreds of books on success, goals, productivity, personal development, etc. One thing that I’ve noticed that appears consistently is the concept of measurement. If one wishes to achieve an objective, one must be able to determine whether progress is being made, or if you’re just keeping yourself busy.
Stephen Covey tells the famous story about a group of explorers in a thick equatorial jungle. They expend tremendous effort wielding machetes, blazing a path through the thick brush. They’re also making great time. After a while a man climbs a tree to see where they are. After he realizes their location, he cries out, “Wrong jungle!”
These explorers were making good time, alright. However, their effort was fruitless as they were measuring the wrong thing. They were concerned about how much distance they covered in a day, not how much closer to their destination they were.
Measurement also becomes important because:
My personal end result is not to weight less. Determining how much my cholesterol level can be improved by better diet and fitness is my purpose. However, weighing less is a key component. Without this, I cannot answer the larger question. Therefore, weighing less is my current focus.
If I want to weigh less, I have to be able to measure and monitor.
I’ve developed a strategy that I’ve shown to work for myself, but I’m aware that there’s a great deal of controversy over the parameters of measuring and monitoring weight. Being curious, I spent some time cruising the ‘Net. At first I was a little surprised by what I found, but only for a moment. It’s an old story, something that I’ve run across again and again. Lots of heat but little light from “experts”.
It’s readily apparent that we humans have no idea how often to weight ourselves for optimal tracking. The “research” out there is of little help, being contradictory. Much of the “research” appears to follow the typical trend for research, being a marketing ploy rather than actual science.
Some things that I have garnered:
Anyhow, these are things that I’ve been pondering for some days. I hope that everybody will experiment and discover their own natural rhythm.
Status: 45 pounds (20 kg) lighter.
 | Maria Sheldon on Useful Tool: PhysicsDiet.com |
 | Selma on The Secret to Weight Loss and… |
 | Joe Average on Life Throws Curve Balls |
 | vic on Life Throws Curve Balls |
 | Charles Goldman on Practice Days |
Joe Average Gets Fit 